Is It Rude To Not Attend A Destination Wedding You're Invited To?

Is It Rude To Not Attend A Destination Wedding You’re Invited To?

Your friend is getting married, and they plan to go the destination wedding route.

While this seems like a fantastic choice for her, is it for you? Finances and other commitments can come in the way.

But should you feel guilty for not attending a destination wedding?

So, Is It Rude To Not Attend A Destination Wedding You’re Invited To?

It is not rude not to go to a destination or any other wedding type. Many must decide which celebrations they want to attend and those they wish to skip yearly. Budgets, babies and other commitments play a huge role in this decision. So, many will weigh the pros and cons of attending a celebration before saying yes to the RSVP card.

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Seven Things to Consider Before You Attend a Destination Wedding

If you receive an invitation card to a wedding destination in your mailbox, you need to weigh out several factors.

1. The Couple Is Important to You

If your best friend or sibling is getting married, it is wise to attend their wedding anywhere they’ve decided to host it.

This is a truly memorable day, and since loyal and sincere people are hard to come across, you should be there celebrating with them.

You might regret later on missing such an important occasion in their life.

Remember that weddings create memories that last a lifetime. And this is truer, especially if they happen in an exciting location with bonding and fun activities.

2. Many Friends Are Attending

As you have been out of school for many years, your lives have changed.

Maybe one of your classmates has met the love of his life, another has started a business, and another relocated to another country.

So as you see, you have much catching up to do.

A destination wedding can bring you and your buddies together. It will feel like a trip as you will be visiting a beautiful location while meeting with long-time lost friends.

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3. You Want a Vacation as Well

An invitation to a destination wedding can come as a shock to many.

But when you read the finer details, you realize it is in a location you have always wanted to visit.

So a vacation can be a motivating factor to attend the wedding.

Other than watching your friends exchange their vows, you can also take this time to relax and enjoy the time in a new area.

This creates memorable experiences tied to the wedding.

However, please note that you need more time in the new place apart from the wedding weekend days.

Remember that on these days you will be busy with wedding activities. So if you are going on vacation, you need to add more days.

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4. You Want to Attend

If you’ve always desired to be a guest at a destination wedding, this is your chance. Sometimes, you don’t need any reason to attend or not to attend someone’s wedding.

We understand that destination weddings need time and money to travel. If you don’t have these, it can be challenging to decide, especially when you really want to go.

However, think through your situation before making a choice.

If you have kids, are they invited? And if they aren’t invited, how will you care for them?

Do you need to be at work during that period? 

5. You Are Not Thrilled with the Location

Let’s say the wedding is happening in Paris. But, you have been to this place many times before.

In that case, you won’t be as thrilled going there again, and this is enough reason not to attend the wedding.

Or maybe you are trying to get pregnant, and the wedding happens in a place with a Zika warning.

When we talk about weddings, we often think of the desires of the happy couple.

But as good as that is, we also should consider our wants and needs.

Declining a destination wedding because of the location is a good reason.

Sure, you love the couple, but you are scared of water, and the wedding is on a cruise, or maybe you don’t do well in the humidity, yet the wedding is in a beachy location.

Is it worth it to undergo this torture for one day? We think it is best to skip the destination wedding in this case and instead send them your well wishes.

6. Your Budget is Tight

Destination weddings are costly adventures.

That is why most couples inform their guests months prior.

But since we have many expenses, we need to meet daily, affording the money for the trip, accommodation, and other costs may be hard.

If the thought of spending on a wedding makes you anxious, you may want to consider missing it.

You can opt to send a gift or invite the newlyweds to dinner to compensate. Alternatively, you can organize a short trip with the couple later on.

7. You Are Not That Close to The Couple

Some couples are not exclusive with their guest list, especially when other people are financing them.

But you don’t have to feel obligated to attend a wedding simply because you have been invited to one.

If your relationship with the couple is strained or superficial, going to the wedding may not be a good idea.

Doing that will mean you spend a considerable amount on people you aren’t that invested in, and you may also not have a great time as you may not know other guests at the wedding.

How Do You Decline a Wedding Invitation?

Deciding not to attend a wedding can put you in a tricky situation.

You don’t want to sound rude, ungrateful and insulting to the couple.

Here are some tips to help you politely decline a wedding invitation.

1. If You Are Close to The Couple

This might be a bit complicated as you don’t want to hurt their feelings.

You can send them an email or a phone call explaining why you won’t attend their wedding.

Make sure you let them know how disappointed you are and that you still care for them and wish them well.

2. If You Aren’t Close to the Couple

This is easy as you don’t need to give many explanations.

Simple check no on the RVSP and write a note wishing them well.

When communicating your decline of the invitation, here are some things to keep in mind:

RSVP Early

Don’t wait until the last minute to send your message. The couple may think you are being rude or unthoughtful.

Be Involved In Pre-Wedding Festivities

Even if you don’t attend the wedding, there are many things you can be involved in, like the bridal shower and bachelorette party.

Find out whether there is a way you can contribute either through planning or with the costs.

Send A Gift

Sending a gift shows your support and gratitude for being invited.

Final Thoughts

Attending a wedding is a personal choice.

So, if you want to and can attend a destination wedding, nothing should stop you.

But if you have decided not to go, communicate your intentions politely.

References

https://www.treeofhearts.co.uk/blog/rude-decline-wedding-invitation/

https://www.washingtonpost.com/business/2019/04/25/stop-with-destination-weddings/

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